| Board : | |
| Author : | |
| Subject : | |
| Date : | |
|
To Whom It May Concern (or more aptly, to whoever hasn't been possessed by demons yet), It's me, Marlo, formerly your most esteemed sergeant of the Buyan Imperial Army Dream Team Investigative Unit. Remember me? Probably not, since I was unceremoniously booted by our now definitely-not-human Queen, post-demon makeover. Ah, the joys of political upheaval and interdimensional intrigue. Quick recap: demon invades, I lead the charge against it, get close to solving the crisis, and what's my reward? A swift kick out of the army, alongside my loyal team who, bless their souls, didn't want to serve under a demon-queen and set down their spears, resigning in support of the cause - a fact that many attention seekers / liars / demons try to hide. Then a malevolent force Zugrasahn (no relation - or ???) went and smashed our southern wall. And guess what? Her Demonic Majesty hasn't lifted a finger to fix it. I guess she'll collude on anything *but* this. Now, I couldn't help but notice, despite Buya's splendor, we somehow overlooked installing something trivial: a water supply. No wonder the wall's still a pile of rubble. But fret not, I come bearing solutions. Since we're apparently opting for hard mode in city management, here's a recipe for making cement without water: 1. Gather your hopes and dreams. Just kidding, you'll need lime and ash (demonic ash would work - which, given our current predicament, might be easier to find than water). 2. Mix them thoroughly. Use your tears if necessary; we're adaptable. 3. Press the mixture into molds or apply it directly to the bricks. Let it set by thinking positive thoughts or whatever works nowadays. May this aid in our city's restoration, or at the very least, provide a good laugh. Yours in exasperation, Marlo | |